You are hereGamehendge Lyrics
Gamehendge Lyrics
Below are all the lyrics to all the songs in the Gamehendge Saga. I've included the "extra" songs that related to, but are not included in, The Man Who Stepped In Yesterday. Enjoy!
Introduction -
Lizards -
Narration -
Tela
Narration -
Wilson -
Narration
Colonel Forbin's Ascent -
Narration
Fly Famous Mockingbird -
Narration -
Sloth -
Narration -
Epilogue: Llama -
Extra Material: McGrupp -
Extra Material: Punch You In The Eye
INTRODUCTION
Wilson
Wilson
Wilson
Wilson
Wilson
Once upon a time there was a mountain that rose out of a vast green
forest. And in the forest there were birds and lakes and rocks and
trees and rivers. The forest was also inhabited by a small group of
people called the lizards. The lizards were a simple people and they
had lived in the forest undisturbed for thousands of years in utter
peace and tranquillity. Once a year when spring came, and the first
blossoms began to show, the lizards would gather at the base of the
mountain, to give thanks for all that they had. They thanked the birds
and they thanked the lakes and they thanked the rocks and the trees
and the rivers; but most importantly, they thanked Icculus. Icculus
lived at the top of the mountain, or at least everyone thought so, for
no one had actually ever seen him. But they knew he existed, because
they had the Helping Friendly Book. Icculus had given the Helping
Friendly Book to the Lizards thousands of years earlier as a gift. It
contained all of the knowledge inherent in the universe, and had
enabled the Lizards to exist in harmony with nature for years. And so
they lived; until one day a traveler arrived in Gamehendge. His name
was Wilson and he quickly became intrigued by the Lizards way of life.
He asked if he could stay on and live in the forest; and the Lizards,
who had never seen an outsider, were happy to oblige. Wilson lived
with the Lizards for a few years, studying the ways of the Helping
Friendly Book, and all was well. Until one morning when they awoke and
the book was gone. Wilson explained that he had hidden the book,
knowing that the Lizards had become dependent on it for survival. He
declared himself king and enslaved the innocent people of Gamehendge.
He cut down the trees and built a city, which he called Prussia. And
in the center of the city he built a castle, and locked in the highest
tower of the castle lay the Helping Friendly Book out of the reach of
the Lizards forever. But our story begins at a different time, not in
Gamehendge, but on a suburban street in Long Island, and our hero is
no king sitting in a castle, he is a retired colonel shaving in his
bathroom.
Colonel Forbin looked square in the mirror and dragged the blade
across his cold creamed skin. He saw the tired little folds of flesh
that lay in a heap beneath his eyes. Fifty-two years of obedient
self-restraint, of hiding his tension behind a serene veil of
composure. For fifty-two years he had piled it all on the back burner,
and for fifty-two years it had boiled, frothing over in a turbulent
storm inside of him. It had escaped through his eyes, reacting with
the cigarette smoke and the fluorescent lights and slowly accumulating
into a sagging mass. He ran his dripping palm across the stubble on
the nape of his neck and thought again about the door. He had
discovered the door some months back on one of his ritualistic morning
walks with his dog McGrupp. It had started out as a typical stroll
with McGrupp bounding joyously ahead of the preoccupied colonel. As
they reached the apex of the hill, he saw it and he knew it had always
been there, and felt foolish for overlooking the door for so long. At
first, he tried to ignore it, but he soon found that it was
impossible, and slowly his newly acquired knowledge transformed his
dreary life into a prison from which there was only one escape. And on
this morning, Colonel Forbin stepped through the door.
LIZARDS
Passing through the corridor I came upon an aging knight
Who leaned against the wall in gnarly armor
He was on his way to see the king
Wilson
Wilson
Wilson
He led me through the streets of Prussia talking
As he tried to crush a bug that scurried underneath his boot-heel
He said there was a place where we should go
So he lead me through the forest to the edge of a lagoon by which
We wandered 'til we reached a bubbly spring
The knight grew very quiet as we stood there
Then he lifted up his visor and he turned to me and he began to sing
chorus:
He said I come from the land of darkness
I said I come from the land of doom
He said I come from the land of Gamehendge
From the land of the big baboon
But I'm never never going back there
And I couldn't if I tried
'Cause I come from the land of Lizards
And the Lizards they have died
And the Lizards they have died
And the Lizards they have died
And the Lizards they have died
He told me that the Lizards were a race of people practically extinct
From doing things smart people don't do
He said that he was once a Lizard too
His name was Rutherford the Brave and he was on a quest to save
His people from the fate that lay before them.
Their clumsy end was perilously near
The Lizards would be saved, he said, if they could be enlightened
By the writings of the Helping Friendly Book
In all of Prussia only one existed
And Wilson had declared that any person who possessed it was a crook
[chorus]
The Helping Friendly Book, it seemed, possessed the ancient secrets
Of eternal joy and never-ending splendor
The trick was to surrender to the flow
We walked along beneath the moon
He lead us through the bush 'till soon
We saw before our eyes a raging river
He said that we could swim it if we tried
And saying this the knight dove in forgetting that his suit of arms
Would surely weigh him down and so he sunk
And as his body disappeared before me
I bowed my head in silence and remembered all thoughts that he had thunk
[chorus]
But Rutherford and Forbin weren't alone. And suddenly an unexpected
movement caught his eye. On the far side of the river he saw a shaggy
creature standing in the weeds who stared across at Forbin with an
unrelenting gaze. A gigantic mass of muscles and claws. The hideous
beast reared back and hurled himself in the water and swam toward the
region where Rutherford lay. And in a flash, the beast was gone,
underneath the surface to the frosty depths below while Forbin,
bewildered, waited alone. The seconds dragged by in what seemed like
hours till finally the colonel felt it all had been a dream. Defeated,
he bowed his head then turned to go. Suddenly with a roar, the
creature emerged before him and held the brave knight's body to the
sky. And the creature laid the knight upon the shore. And the colonel
fell beside his friend in prayer that he'd survive. And Rutherford,
brave Rutherford was alive.
Forbin and the unit monster were crouched over the soggy knight
carefully removing his bulky helmet when the colonel heard a sound
behind him. He turned around and came face to face with an enormous
shaggy horse-like creature covered from head to tail with alternating
blotches of brown and white. It was a two-toned multi-beast, and atop
the multi-beast sat the most beautiful woman the colonel had ever
seen. After fifty-two years of undaunted bachelorhood, the colonel
felt a feeling rush over him as he had never felt before.
TELA
The sky is burning in this lonely man
And I kneel by the river and I feel the sand and the wind
The wind from beyond the mountain
The wind from beyond the mountain
And she comes to me in this lonely land
And looks down from the multi-beast on which she rides like the wind
The wind from beyond the mountain
The wind from beyond the mountain
Tela was born in a vulgar crooked hut
In the shadow of Wilson's castle
Venomous scorn from a life of bitter toil
In the shadow of Wilson's castle
Glory esteem fueled by her hatred it grew
Swelling to the point where it would
Burst at the seems there was nothing she could do
Tela Tela jewel of Wilson's foul domain
Tela Tela jewel of Wilson's foul domain
A lullaby the breezes whisper
And I look into her eyes and my frozen heart begins to thaw
And burns, 'til layer after layer melts away into a pool
A sky blue mirror of her eyes
And my soul is made of marble but in her gaze I crumble into dust
And drift away on the wind
The wind from beyond the mountain
The wind from beyond the mountain
Tela grew strong from her struggle to endure
In the shadow of Wilson's castle
Time touched her wounds and shelter proved the cure
In the shadow of Wilson's castle
Each passing day seemed to feed the brazen serpent locked inside
And liberate the spirit she'd concealed for so long
There was no place left to hide
Tela Tela jewel of Wilson's foul domain
Tela Tela jewel of Wilson's foul domain
A lullaby the breezes whisper
Tela reached out her hand and helped Forbin on to the back of the
multi- beast, and together they rode off into the forest.
As they rode, Tela explained to him about Wilson and the Helping
Friendly Book. She told the colonel that she was part of a revolution
to overthrow the evil king. The leader of the revolution was a Lizard
named Errand Wolfe who was out to avenge the death of his son Roger.
Roger, she said, had been executed by Wilson at the age of fourteen on
suspicion of treason. He had been abducted from his home and hung in
the public square.
The two rode on in silence, deeper and deeper into the heart of the
forest until they came to the outskirts of a small community. Tela
explained to Forbin that they had reached the base of the
revolutionaries. The colonel looked up and there in the center of the
clearing stood Errand Wolfe. He was a small man but his presence was
overpowering. He seemed to emit a kind of violent energy that sent
chills down the colonel's spine. And as the multi-beast moved towards
him, he raised his fist in anger, and his voice filled the forest.
WILSON
Oh out near Stonehenge, I lived alone
Oh out near Gamehendge, I chafed a bone
Wilson, King of Prussia, I lay this hate on you
Wilson, Duke of Lizards
I beg it all trune for you
Talk my duke a mountain, Helping Friendly Book
Insofar as fiefdom, I think you bad crook
Wilson, King of Prussia, I lay this hate on you
Wilson, Duke of Lizards
I beg it all true for you
I talked to my son Roger, Rutherford the same
[or "I talked to Mike Christian, Rog and Pete the same"]
When we had that meeting, over down near Game(henge)
Wilson, King of Prussia, I lay this hate on you
Wilson, Duke of Lizards
I beg it all true for you
You got me back thinkin' that you're the worst one
I must inquire, Wilson
Can you still have fun?
Wilson
Can you still have fun?
Wilson
Can you still have fun?
Wilson
Meanwhile, in the main square in Prussia, the state of the revolution
was taking another turn for the worst. A crowd of townspeople had
gathered to witness the hanging of Wilson's accountant, Mr. Palmer. It
seemed that Palmer had been a revolutionary himself and had been
extorting Wilson's money to fund the revolution. Palmer stood on the
scaffold with Wilson and the AC/DC Bag, an electrified robot-hangman
with a black bag over his head. Wilson seemed pleased as he began to
speak.
AC/DC BAG
Mr. Palmer is concerned with the thousand dollar question
Just like Roger he's a crazy little kid
I've got the time if you've got the inclination
So cheer up Palmer, you'll soon be dead
The noose is hanging, at least you won't die wondering
Sit up and take notice Tell it like it is
If I were near you I wouldn't be far from you
I've got a feeling you know what you did
chorus:
AC/DC Bag
AC/DC Bag
AC/DC Bag
DC Bag
(2x)
Time to put your money where your mouth is
Put 'em in a field and let 'em fight it out
I'm running so fast my feet don't touch the ground
I'm a stranger here I'm going down
Let's get down to the nitty gritty
Let's get this show on the road
I'll show you mine if you show me yours
I'm breathing hard - open the door
[chorus]
Brain dead, and made of money
No future at all
Pull down the blinds and run for cover
No future at all
Who would've thought it, that's where I am
No future at all
Don't sweat it, that's where I am
Whoa, carry me down, down, down, down
By that night, news of Palmer's death had traveled back to the camp.
Spirits were low and Colonel Forbin felt devastated. Even though he
had only been in Gamehendge for one day, he had already developed a
deep hatred for Wilson. He wanted desperately to help the
revolutionaries, but without Palmer, it seemed hopeless. He wandered
slowly through the camp and passed Errand Wolfe, sitting by the fire
with Rutherford, who had returned that afternoon. He walked on and
soon found himself outside of Tela's hut. Forbin knocked and walked
in. Tela sat behind a makeshift desk in the center of a room that was
littered with small cages containing spotted stripers, a tiny
three-legged breed of animal. The unit monster sat in the corner. The
colonel took a step toward Tela and spoke. "I needed to come here
tonight" he said, "to tell you that I've fallen in love with you." He
looked to her eyes for approval but her face remained frozen in an
expressionless stare. An awkward blanket of silence fell over the room
and hung for a long moment before being shattered by the sound of the
door swinging violently open. It was Rutherford the Brave. The
ironclad knight rushed across the room and gripped the throats of Tela
and the unit monster in each of his mighty hands. They struggled to
break free but even the unit monster was no match for Rutherford's
power and soon it was over. The bodies fell to the floor in a lifeless
heap. Colonel Forbin stepped forward from where he stood in the corner
unable to contain his confusion and rage and screamed "WHY?" His
question was answered by Errand Wolfe who had quietly slipped through
the doorway during the confusion. "She was a spy," he said, and
explained to Forbin that she had been sending information to Wilson
using the spotted stripers as carriers. Roger's death had aroused his
suspicion, and Palmer's had confirmed it. The colonel stood in silence
in a world that had turned up-side-down so many times that he no
longer knew which way was up. It had all seemed so simple when he
first arrived. Good versus evil, and of course he had sided with good
as he had done all his life. And now, he stood and stared into the
eyes of Errand Wolfe and he saw evil. The entire picture began to seem
like an enormous puzzle with one piece missing, and the colonel knew
what that piece was. "Within twenty-four hours," he said to Errand
Wolfe, "You will have the Helping Friendly Book." And even as the
words were leaving his lips, he found himself running out the door and
into the forest, not towards Prussia, but toward the great mountain
looming in the distance.
COLONEL FORBIN'S ASCENT
Colonel Forbin stared up at the mountain
And wiped away the beads of sweat
That glistened on his brow
His tired feet were buried in the quagmire
And his bloodshot eyes saw all that lay between him
And fulfillment of his vow
And he felt his fingers wrap around a knotted root
And pulled his body upwards
To a sea green mossy boulder
And he dragged his weary carcass [or "shit-ass"] up the mountain
And he climbed so slowly
He climbed so slowly
Ahead
Ahead
Suddenly he heard the crack of thunder
And the rocks began to crumble overhead
And tumble down the mountain to the
Dismal swamp that lay beneath the jagged cliffs
through which his path had led
And the earth began to quake beneath his feet
And the mighty mountain changed before his eyes
And he stood amidst a sea of dust and rocks and stones
Cascading down the mountain
And a thousand birds were headed for the sky. Oh...
The sacred creed will be yours
And if you wait until tomorrow
The sacred creed will be yours
To devour
Yours
To seize
And to obey
Obey
When the dust had cleared, the colonel lifted up his head
And was driven to his knees by a blazing beam of light
And he saw the silhouette that stood before him
And he bowed in reverence
Trembling in the shadow of the mighty legend's form
Icculus the prophet stood before his eyes
Looking down on Colonel Forbin
Where he shuddered in the puddles and the muck
And he quietly addressed him
And he spoke so slowly
He spoke so slowly
Ahead
He said
Colonel Forbin I know why you've come here
And I'll help you with your quest to gain the knowledge that you lack
I call upon my faithful friend the mockingbird
To fly and seize the helping book and bring it to your shack
And a tree of knowledge in your soul will grow
And the Helping Friendly Book will plant the seed
But I warn you that all knowledge seeming innocent and pure
Becomes a deadly weapon in the hands of avarice
And greed
The sacred greed will be yours
And if you wait until tomorrow
The sacred creed will be yours
To devour
Yours
To seize
And to obey
And to obey
And the famous mockingbird swooped down out of the sky and landed on
Icculus's shoulder, and Icculus whispered into the bird's ear, and it
flew off toward Wilson's castle in the valley below.
FAMOUS MOCKINGBIRD
Fly famous mockingbird
Fly...
Fly famous mockingbird
Fly...
Fly famous mockingbird
Fly...
Fly famous mockingbird
Fly...
Fly...
Fly...
Fly famous mockingbird
Fly...
The next morning at the camp Errand Wolfe and Rutherford stood frozen
in awe as the famous mockingbird flew out of the sky and laid the
Helping Friendly Book at their feet. The quest for the book had
dragged on for so many years that it's sudden appearance left the men
staring in disbelief, unsure of what their next move should be. The
shock wore off quickly though, and Errand Wolfe shot into high gear.
He snatched up the book with one hand and the famous mockingbird with
the other, and began to inform Rutherford of his plan. He would first
kill Wilson, and then put the Helping Friendly Book to work for him.
With Rutherford's aid he fastened the famous mockingbird to a pole,
with glue and rubber bands, to insure the secrecy of his mission, and
then set out to find the only man in Gamehendge who could handle the
job of eliminating a King.
SLOTH
They call me the sloth
Way down in the ghetto
Italian Spaghetti
Singing falsetto
Sleeping all day
Rip Van Winklin'
Spend my nights in bars
Glasses tinklin'
I'm so bad
He's so nasty
Ain't got no friends
Real outcasty
Stay out of my way
Or you'll end up a cripple
I'll take this piece of paper
And slice your nipple
They call me the sloth
Way down in the ghetto
Italian Spaghetti
Singing falsetto
Sleeping all day
Rip Van Winklin'
Spend my nights in bars
Glasses tinklin'
Colonel Forbin stared at the fourteen bars that stood at the end of
the cell. He ran his hand across the cold, damp dungeon wall and
thought again about the door. He had traveled through the door out of
necessity. Once he knew it existed, he simply couldn't leave it alone.
Just like Wilson. Just like Tela. Just like Errand Wolfe. And he sat
in the dungeon, and he realized that he was back again through the
door. And through the tiny window in the corner of his cell, he heard
the distant strains.
Errand
Errand
Errand
Errand
And from atop the mountain Icculus looked down on all that went on
below him. And he smiled.
POSSUM
I come from atop the mountain baby
Where the people come to pray
I come from atop the mountain baby
Where the people come to pray
There ain't no truth in action
'Less you believe it anyway
I was riding down the road one day and
Someone hit a possum
I was riding down the road one day and
Someone hit a possum
The road was his end
His end was the road
So they say
Whoa possum...
possum, possum...
POSSUM
Whoa possum...
possum, possum...
POSSUM
Whoa possum, possum
Your end is the road
I was riding down the road one day and
Someone hit a possum
I was riding down the road one day and
Someone hit a possum
The road was his end
His end was the road
So they say
Whoa possum...
possum, possum...
POSSUM
Whoa possum...
possum, possum...
POSSUM
Whoa possum,
Your end is the road
Whoa possum, possum
Your end is the road
LLAMA
Many years after the overthrow of Wilson, a rebel soldier crouching high
on a hilltop above the war torn forests of Gamehendge spots a group of
loyalists approaching from their lakeside encampment below.
His trusty llama stands beside him, loaded down with a canvas pack that
holds two large bazooka type guns to the animal's sides. Near the man sits
a cache of blastoplast, each capable of destroying the entire hillside in
an instant...
Sunrise over the turquoise mountains
Messenger birds in sight
They came up through the valley
Both sides at a time
Through the cold steady rain
Raid!
I bend down
Poke a double decker on a llama
Llama, Taboot Taboot
Trigger a blastoplast, ramshackle laker recedes
I start to run
It was the loudest thing I'd ever heard
And I knew my time had come
To enter the delta
Leave it on press
Leave it on press
Depress, Depress
Llama, Taboot Taboot
Leave it on press
Depress, Depress
Llama, Taboot Taboot
Llama, Taboot Taboot
Llama, Taboot Taboot
Taboot Taboot
Taboot Taboot
Taboot
McGrupp
I've alternated my meager flock
To the shores of the Baltic Sea
The teeth of time have stowed the rhyme
Of how things should be
My cave, my house, my turning wheel
My little docking pup
The march of Colonel Forbin
And his fleet hound called McGrupp
The grime of countless workdogs
Has collected in my sink
I tie my nose with spandex hose
Before I get a drink
While on frozen warthogs
With its poison in our minds
The ferns that spot our children
Are encased in orange rinds
All times and seasons are the reasons
That people and their clans
Have stowed the Famous Mockingbird
With glue and rubber bands
They writhe and cry in agony
As Rutherford the Brave
Chokes Tela and the Unit Monster
Managing to save
The spotted striper's multi-beast
And thereby cheat his grave
I'd like to get his autograph
But he looks too much like Dave (4-6 x)
Punch You In The Eye
I come from the land where the oceans freeze
Spent three long months on the open seas
Paddled 'til it seemed I could take no more
When my ship hit ground on Prussia's shores
How was I to know that day
That the winds had swept me Wilson's way
'Cause soon towards me from the East
Came Wilson and his men on multi-beasts
Well it seems he didn't like my face
And I quickly learned that Prussia was an evil place
They tied me to a chair with a giant clip
And held a piece of paper to my tender nip(ple)
Then they tossed the chair in a tiny shack
And told me not to worry 'cause they'd soon be back
But I loosened up the binds where my hands were lashed
And ran towards the cove where my boat was stashed
Singing "Oh Wilson, someday I'll kill you 'til you die
Oh Wilson, Punch you in the Eye"
When Wilson knew that I was loose
I'd surely be subjected to some real abuse
Maybe end up hanging from the nearest tree
So angrily I paddled to the open sea
But the sea was eager to beat me back
And the waves grew huge and deadly black
And the gray clouds rumbled over my head
And I feared in my heart that I'd soon be dead
When the morning came and the storm had passed
And the dismal fog began at last
To open up before my eyes
And there I saw to my surprise
Chains and specks of islands curved
Where palm trees dipped and seagulls swerved
And I parked my kayak on a stone
And yelled across the ocean to his evil throne
I said "Oh Wilson, someday I'll kill you 'til you die
Oh Wilson, Punch you in the Eye
Wilson, kill you 'til you die
Oh Wilson, Punch you in the Eye"
